Jennifer Plesko

There has been a lot of talk in the news this week about the delusions of the fashion industry, so you know I gotta weigh in. I know y’all are probably tired of me and my soapbox, but hey - it’s my blog and I’ll gripe if I want to.

In this corner, we have Ralph Lauren. In April, they fired Filippa Hamilton, a model who has worked for them for eight years, for being too big. At 5’10” and 120 pounds, everyone knows that’s ludicrous. Plus, she says she hasn’t gained any weight from the time they hired her. Last week, a digitally-altered picture of her in a Polo Ralph Lauren ad surfaced in Japan looking freakishly thin and stirring up a raging controversy. Hamilton appeared on the “Today Show” to voice her objection to the photo saying “I saw my face on this super-extremely skinny girl, which is not me; it’s not healthy, it’s not right.”

Then in this corner, we have shoe designer extraordinaire Christian Louboutin. He has been tapped by Mattel to design shoes for three special collection Barbies and has apparently decided her legs needed to be reshaped first because her ankles are too fat. Yes. The plastic doll, who has undergone decades of criticism for her perfect proportions (if she were human, she would measure 39-18-33), is actually being described as fat.

And then there’s my favorite, German fashion designer and creative director for the fashion house Chanel Karl Lagerfeld. Last week, top German fashion magazine Brigitte announced that they would only be publishing pictures of real women rather than professional models from now on. But Lagerfeld, referred to henceforth as Herr Douchebag, said “No one wants to see curvy women. You’ve got fat mothers with their bags of chips sitting in front of the television and saying that thin models are ugly.” (This is the same delusional jerk who thinks Heidi Klum is too heavy.) He went on to say that the fashion industry is about “dreams and illusions.” Exactly. The dream and illusion that women can look like a 5′11″ size 2 model who has been airbrushed and Photoshopped beyond recognition.

English model Katie Green protested Herr Douchebag’s remarks saying, “If he thinks the fashion industry is all about ‘dreams and illusions’ then he should go to an eating disorder ward at any hospital. That will show him how this fantasy fashion world he has helped build makes women seriously ill and fighting for their lives. He says no one wants to see real women - but I know lots of real men and I can tell you that they prefer the curves!” Preach it, sister.

So let’s review: We have Ralph Lauren – a saggy, fuzzy-headed old man

We have Christian Louboutin – a little, bald Frenchman

And we have Herr Douchebag – a formerly obese Botox junkie with an obvious bronzer addiction who wears high collars to keep his jowls in check

And these men feel entitled to tell women that they’re not thin or attractive enough? Why do they get to decide that?

I realize that the fashion industry maintains that models are thin because they have to fit into the sample sizes, which are typically a 2 or 4. But if a tall, thin, gorgeous woman like Filippa Hamilton can’t even fit into your sample sizes - guess what - you’re doing it wrong.

Here’s an oldie but a goodie: Dove - Evolution Commercial